30/08/15 Hot Rods To Hell (1967)

Review to come.

And here it is:

Silly old film about a man with a bad back and a teenage gang in their '30s.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0061784/
Nonsense/10

Mimsy Farmer? LOL etc.

Any relation to Sausage Smallholder?

"Fo' sure, fool, I got 'em waiting for you. Noe get yo' bitch ass here wit' my money!"

"Much obliged, Pimp Silverbeard."

This custom 'Vette and Ford are possibly this film's best actors.

This guy, seriously, is supposed to be a delinquent teenager. 

Fuck off, J. R. Hartley!

Looks like a squashed version of Jeff Bridges.

Perkin.

29/08/15 Cannibals And Carpet Fitters (2014)

Short film. Well made, occasionally amusing script.

You can watch it yourself here: http://www.cannibalsandcarpetfitters.co.uk/the-film

I imagine the director will go onto bigger things.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3425302
6.4/10

Perkin.

29/08/15 Wasteland (2013)

Mini-budget zombie effort that benefits from having a very good performance from the main player, but suffers from terrible hammery by everyone else. Also makes the mistake of continuing, on an entirely unrelated plot strand, for twenty minutes after it should've ended.


http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2352892/
4.1/10

Perkin.

28/08/2015 Big Sky (2015)

A girl is travelling across America with her mum for agoraphobia treatment when their car is held up by gunmen for reasons that aren't particularly clear but we weren't particularly watching as the film's pretty dull.  The moral of the story is agoraphobia specialists should understand their subject better and do home visits.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2689958

4.5/10

Podd

28/08/2015 The Dark Knight (2008)

There's likely a previous scathing Film Plop review but we folk at Plop Towers are apparently the only people on the planet who believe this film to be a sack of overrated old balls.  In the fog of meh Heath Ledger's Joker is entertaining in a hammy way but Christian "Whispering Makes Me Intense" Bale's Batman makes me want George Clooney to cape up again. Although Batman & Robin was nothing special it didn't take itself too seriously and it didn't have the entire world think it was a masterpiece of cinema. This film lasts for fucking days and although I was only semi watching Batman doesn't seem to actually feature that much. Does anyone genuinely think the Nolan Batman films are amazing or is it just because an iPhone app said they should? And what happened to Robin anyway? Not even a zero hours contract for the little fella?!

Dark Knight (Old Shite)/10

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0468569

Podd

27/08/2015 Tiger House (2015)

Boy meets girl. Boy dates girl. Boy accidentally shoots girl in the leg with a crossbow (as you do). Boy and girl are in his posh family home when it's raided by crim types. Not badly acted (especially by the standards of the old pony we watch) but beige.

5/10

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2911674

Podd

25/08/15

Happy birthday, Smalls!