11/03/16 Pride And Prejudice And Zombies (2016)

Too much ruffled poncery and not enough zombies.

Never read any Jane Austen, and knowing that the original wouldn't have had the mild horror stuff makes me forever inclined not to.

A bunch of women talking about which chinless arsehole they want to marry? Sounds like ITV4 or some shit, fuck that and take your corset with you.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1374989/

5/10

Perkin.

05/03/16 The Visit (2015)

Documentary from the talented Michael Madsen, as in the film maker, not the craptor whose best known for cutting off a rubber ear.

He gathers a large collection of thinky-people and asks them what they reckon would happen if aliens ever visited Earth.

He's made an excellent selection of boffin-folk as they give their best educated guesses about how such contact would effect us from a social, religious, scientific and military point of view.

Most importantly, however, was that at one point the camera passes a wall that someone appears to have graffitied with the word 'pubes'.

LOL etc.

Anyway, it's very good.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3833746/

8.8/10

Perkin.

05/03/16 Future Shock! The Story Of 2000AD (2014)

Anyone who grew up in Britain in the '70s and '80s will be aware of 2000AD the comic. This documentary does a great job in reminding you how big is was back then.

To condense it greatly, it can be summarised as "Fuck the Tories, let's get pissed and try and get kids to think about the world."

If you ask me, that's a life well spent.

There is, thankfully, much more detail to the story than that, and it's told in a very entertaining way. There's some genuine LOL moments, some naked display of ego, shameful admission of sexism in comics, and a fantastic final line.

If you like comics, UK history or looking at strange people who draw pictures for a living, this is definitely worth a go.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2822584/

9/10

Perkin.

04/03/16 Cryptic (2014)

Terrible shit.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3129892/
2/10

Perkin.

03/03/16 Plan 9 (2015)

A film loosely based on, rather than a direct remake of, Plan 9 From Outer Space. Which I'm pretty confident you've heard of.

With a budget and production values not much greater than the original, it manages to just about stay on the right side of entertaining and some of the dialogue made me chuckle. Also, if you're a fan of cleavage, there's quite a lot in this.

Boobs! \o/

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2014319/

5.5/10

Perkin.

02/03/16 You Are Not Alone (2014)

Film about a young lady getting stalked by some fucking nutbag with killy intentions. In an effort to be original, it's told from a first person POV, so you get to see life through the eyes of a teenage girl.

Those last few words have probably sent ripples through the internet and spiked its masturbatory algorithms.

However, in a move that will flatline the interest of many, this isn't footage of shower gel being applied to intimate areas for two hours, but rather a few days in the life of an arse-bendingly annoying, vapid sounding dullard who ends up "Like, totally, umm, being followed or something. By some, like, guy, who wants to kill me or, like, whatever?"

If you're, like, fifteen, or something, it's probably, like, OK.

If you're not, it's a bit tedious.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3576044/

5/10

Perkin.

01/03/16 The Fear Of 13 (2015)

Storyville documentary where a chap who's spent most of his life in prison sits in front of the camera and tells his story.

Quite a story it is as well, although the overall message is one of one human spirit eventually triumphing under a weight that would crush many others.

Well worth 90 minutes of your life to hear about thirty years of someone else's.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt5083702/

9/10

Perkin