27/04/13 The Last Stand (2013)

65yr old Arnold Schwarzenegger makes his unwanted return to films playing the sheriff in a small desert town who has to struggle with his creaks and groans and get back on form to fight off some drug-baddies who are passing through.

Yes, you could say this is the movie where Arnie spends 100 minutes polishing his rusty sheriff's badge.

Arple! Fnibb!

Anyway, it also has other people, explosions, lots of exclamation gear changes (when someone's driving a car and they change gear, for no reason other than to emphasise a point) a few jokes that work, massive flaws in logic and reminds us that there are no problems that cannot be solved with guns.

If there wasn't such a thing as weapon preparation montage scenes, I think popular American cinema would only have about five hours of film recorded in the last thirty years.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1549920/

4.5/10

"If you've recently created a hybrid of Nicolas Cage, John Travolta and Steve Buscemi, point to him now!"

Last Of The Summer Wine. Suicide pact finale. Many viewers surprised.

"If we go this way, we can stop here for ice cream!"

Niche smut presents: Basket fisting.

One of the 874 gear changes you can enjoy in this film. *Belms*

An everyday American going peacefully about his business.

"Are you laughing at my body fluid cleanup kit? I'm 65, my arse has packed up."

This guy wasn't in the film, he was in a documentary we watched recently. Just look at his name.

Perkin.

30/12/12 Killing Them Softly (2012)

Slow-burner crime flick that's thankfully free of the usual action film silliness.

Two low level goons rob a card game run by the mob and, by making off with the wedge, apparently cause the city's 'criminal economy' to collapse.

It's a rather heavy metaphor of American economics and the wealth divide that comes with unshackled capitalism, set in 2008 the Bush/Obama electoral race plays out in the background to reinforce this. The plot of the film itself is an obvious micro-study of America's wobbly fiscal position, Brad Pitt's final sentences in the film sum it up well.

Although set in recent times, the film seems to make a strong effort to look like something from past decades. Aside from the election race footage (seemingly on every screen passed in the film) there is one brief shot of a mobile phone, everything else: clothes, hairstyles, cars, even the weapons used are far less era specific, giving the film a drab 1970s look. The retro look suits the film's throwback vibe, it's far more about dialogue and acting than crash-visuals and violence fetishism. Y'know, like film's used to be.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1764234/
8/10

Perkin.