08/11/12 Citadel (2012)

The three most horrifying, bowel-icing words in the English language?

Terminal bum plague?
Nope.

Ben Stiller film?
Nope.

Fritzl basement party?
Nah.

Four minute warning?
No.


It is, of course:

Scottish council estate.


This utterly cheerless film is set on one and is sadly not anything to do with the mid-80s computer game Citadel I enjoyed as a young 'un. You're meant to have sympathy with the main guy because his wife's all monged-up in a coma and he's got a baby that some teenagers appear to wanna snatch and a priest was rude to him and stuff. We just wanted to give him a good slap.

I think there's some message about conquering your inner demons or some shit in the film, but it might equally have been something about pottery, such was my disinterest by the end.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1641975/
2.5/10

Might have been an Irish council estate. Dunno.

Poster for the film.

Sadly not the film.

Perkin.