Saturday, 15 November 2014

13/11/14 D.O.A. (1950)

I saw the 1988 remake of this in my mid-teens and really enjoyed the central idea of a poisoned man, with only hours to live, solving his own murder. I imagine the acty-stuff and hairstyles were all cabbage, but the idea's still a good one. Always wanted to see the original, and now I have.

Anyway, I also enjoyed the original, the plot is essentially the same, if the details are a little different. Some of the acting's blunt enough to cosh a penguin but it's good fun.

If films are anything to go by, living in the '40s and '50s would've sent me fucking bonkers due to the constant background orchestras.


Beer and fags, the preferred breakfast of 1950s young professionals.

'Challenge Butter'?
Rivals of 'Difficulty Margarine'? 

"I want tits"

Surprisingly, the word 'Hospital' wasn't invented until 1951, a year after this film was made.

"I'd like to order a surprised looking man, please"

"You're in luck, madam. Just had one delivered."

Ha! Look at the little midgey fella! Seriously, that's some shite casting for a goon. Looks like a 10yr old in a hat.


13/11/14 Savaged (2013)

A young, gentle, deaf woman inherits a lovely vintage car (late '60s Pontiac GTO, if anyone's as boring as me and such details are of interest) And decides to take the scenic route for the long drive to meet up with her boyfriend so they can move in together and have a happy life.

Unfortunately, she bumps into some redneck desert dwellers who take advantage of her kindly nature. They kidnap, violate and torture her.
With her cast into the desert at the point of death, a shamanic local uses his ability to connect this world and the next and the spirit of a vengeful indigenous chief leaps into her empty vessel. 'Together' they go and, well, mash the fuck out of the bad guys.

This sounds awful, and pretty much any description of the film's plot will make it sound like thunderous fucking arse, however, as far as supernatural revenge films go, it's an absolute belter. Very, very entertaining, exciting and fun. Much better than we expected.


12/11/14 Gutshot Straight (2014)

Probably the best film Steven Seagal's been in and also probably the film where he's had the least screen time. His hair is magical, like some kind of creeping floss.

The actual plot involves some cunt who plays cards who gets in over his head with some other bloke and a woman or something. I dunno, generic thriller shit. Wasn't bad though.


12/11/14 Mercy (2014)

Boy. Nan. Demons and whatnot. Not bad for a TV film style spooker.


11/11/14 Guardians Of The Galaxy (2014)

Two hours of pixels with occasional humans. I wish Marvel would fuck off.

Monday, 10 November 2014

09/11/14 House On Haunted Hill (1959)

Pretty laughable spooker, even by the standards of the day I would think. However it's still much, much better than the terrible remake forty or so years later. According to IMDB the decent profit this made was one of the inspirations for Hitchcock to make Psycho.

Ha! He has 'cock' in his name. Hitch Cock. Like he's tied it up or something.

Anyway, as you were.

Like the poster though.


Sunday, 9 November 2014

09/11/14 Superman (1978)

You've seen this, everyone has. So instead of banging on about how much better super hero films were back then, which they were, I will show you something that caught my eye while we watched it.

Lex Luther has got an ornamental copper arse:

There it is, just to the right of Ned Beatty. I wonder if it was a reference to his role in Deliverance?