Monday, 16 July 2012

16/07/12 Born To Raise Hell (2010)

Global embarrassment Steven Segal  is in this film, he goes over to Eastern Europe to shoot people over something or other. He's probably angry at the film's massively generic title. Could've just as easily called it Born To Paint Elbows or Born to Wear Slippers for all the plot relevance it has.

A lot of it is filmed using a desaturation/sepia filter that gives Segal's head the curious appearance of a swollen orange scrotum.

He has a sex scene in this, which is funny as he's such a fat cunt these days he keeps that long leather jacket he wears for everything on during it. I remember seeing an interview with him on Video View (long forgotten film review show) where he spoke about the immorality of sex scenes, whereas all the scenes in his films where he kicks people brains off are obviously fine.

Also, if I was the gayest man in history, having just got back from forty years in a dickless space-box (like General Zod's in Superman 2) and upon my return to Earth I was offered a night of bumsexual fun with him, I'd be all about the tits instantly.

His music is hilarious as well. It's like someone threw a guitar and tape recorder into the special ward.

Anyway, awful man, terrible film.

A genuine still from the film.




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